So tomorrow is our big day. When we found out about Lily's cleft on Jan. 26th, 2012 the surgery date could not come soon enough. Well now we are here. I am not going to lie, I have had a LOT of anxiety about this. And I keep thinking, be anxious about nothing, but in prayer and supplication give God the Glory (in my own wording, ha). In the last week I have really tried to make that my heart cry. It has been so hard to thank God for the cleft. Such a hard thing to do because I still don't know how this is Glorifying him. One of the ladies I work with was talking with me and we came to agree that not always do we know how this is Glorifying. Sometimes just words that people read can further the Kindom of God, so who knows, maybe you are reading this now and God will touch your heart and call you to be a true child of his. This journey has made me grow closer to God than I ever would have had this not happened. Had we had a little girl that required no medical intervention, I would have been going along just as I was before. Never really, TRUELY, relying on God. I have had to lean on him more in the last 8 months than I have my entire life. I know God put this in our path to strengthen our relationship with him. Again, while it hasn't been easy, everytime I give everything over to him I feel a sense of relief that only God himself can provide. It is a healing that surpasses all understanding. I have been reading over Bible verses provided to me by some very dear people. I will continue to meditate on those and will keep those for any future surgeries Lily has as well as to give her one day. What a special thing! I have had such a peace about surgery this morning and I give Glory to God for that! I know in my heart he will bless her and give her strenth for any obsticals she will have to overcome if she always trust's in the Lord. As a woman who has put her faith in my Lord, Jesus Christ, I know that things will not always be easy (obviously) but that he will carry me through anything life throws at me. This will include tomorrow as I hand over my baby girl to the surgeon. He will not only be with me for comfort but he will be holding my baby girl in his arms and giving her comfort. He will also be guiding the doctors and nurses caring for her in the OR and recovory. Please keep us and everyone that will be caring for Lily in your prayers tomorrow! We so much appreciate it.
If you wonder how I have this incredible faith let me tell you. First, I knew I had sined. Even a simple little white lie is a sin. We all are sinners. All have sinned and fallen short of the Glory of God (Rom 3:23). We maybe good people but think of it like this. If someone you loved dearly were killed by a drunk driver and they went before the judge and the judge said, "well you have done all other good things in your life and even though you messed up this once I will let you go", would you think that was a fair judge? No. You must pay the penalty for your wrong doing. Same with God, he has to be a fair judge, plain and simple. Second, I knew I had to confess with my mouth to God that I was a sinner. You have to do that because you have to admit to God and yourself that you are guilty. If you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved (Rom 10:9). If you do this God will forgive you. It won't be an easy path in life but you will always have God on your side! For God so Loved the world that he gave his only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send His son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved (John 3:16-17). If you have any questions please let me know. I share this because like I said, I don't know why God gave us this obsticle but though this I am going to seek how to give Him the Glory though it all! I love you friends, and again thank you for your continued prayers!
Kari
